A living Sacrifice

Listening to this song, I’m reminded that when I go through tough times, and life is very very hard and I am utterly shattered and broken... that I actually ASKED for this!!! What???

I didn’t ask to go through specific hardships.
I didn’t ask to be abused.
I didn’t ask to be raped.
I didn’t ask for my husband to leave me.
I didn’t want to be divorced.
I didn’t ask to lose everything.
I didn’t ask to face homelessness.
I didn’t ask for close loved ones to die or be killed.
I didn’t ask for my serious health issues.
I didn’t ask for my brain injury.
I didn’t want to feel so spent and tired.

But I have said; Lord Refine me. Mold me.
I did surrender and say “You are the potter.”
I did say, “Lord have your way.”
I did say “I will follow you, no matter what”
I did say “Lord I am yours.”

I remember that time I committed my life to Christ and said “You can have your way with me.”
I did say I would be a living sacrifice.

So all I have been through and have yet to go through, is in essence, the culmination of God answering prayers, meeting me and pruning.

Painful.

I think that’s why I read Psalm 145 out loud every day. There’s a lot of meat in it.

But the cliffs notes:

He is God.
He is Holy.
He is Powerful.
He is Mighty.
He is BIG.
He is Strong.
He is Just.
He is Creator
He is Righteous
AND
He is Good.
He is Kind
He is Forgiving
He Lifts Us
He Stays with us
He answers us.
He Is Faithful.
He will satisfy

And there is this balance in the tension of all those truths. It’s not one or the other. It’s all of it.

Listen:

https://youtu.be/UGFCbmvk0vo