Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Random Devotions
August 6 2013
My devotion today: The Lord is near to the broken hearted! Boy is He ever! Thank you Jesus. In the words of my dear friend Valerie " when you're really going through it and the enemy attacks you fiercely, you can be SURE something freaking wonderful is about to Happen. Just watch and see what God does!" Yep. From her keyboard to Gods ears...lol Something Freaking wonderful IS about to happen! Believe it for yourself, friends. about to board my plane for home. Man I have missed my family!
July 25th 2013
This post is going to be meaningful to only a Handful of you. But it's what's on my mind. Bear with me, its long but worth it. I wish Sydney Sheridan had been here, because I know that she of all people would appreciate what I just experienced. I spent the last 90 minutes, with "Seed Sowers" that is, 88 different missionaries from all over the world. Name a country they have been there. But these aren't just any missionaries, these are "veterans & pioneers" most of them are in their MID 80's and have seen God do things of epic proportions!! They have such incredible testimonies and legacies. Some of them 50 and 60 years if service "in the field". And the best part?? They aren't DONE yet! These folks all live together in one community, literally the same building and compound. They get together regularly, several times a week, to pray for the newbies, teach newbies, mentor and counsel folks just coming home from the field and praying for their countries of service, praying for relatives (like me) and praying for so many other needs. They serve one another, by sharing duties, such as transportation, housekeeping, meals etc... I have never been around such incredible and inspirational group of people all in one place. I'm overwhelmed. So many hugged me, told me they have been praying for me for years, some had tears in their eyes as they knew my story about how I came from the Jungle and were so glad to finally meet me. The sheer joy on their faces from the lives they have led, and the friendships they have formed...they don't complain, they only love, and serve. The most Christ like examples ever. I love this place my Aunt and Uncle live and I am bringing home a copy of the book "The Seed Sowers" which chronicles each of their legacies. I am in such awe. Thank you Jesus for letting me be here.
July 19th 2013
The steadfast Love of The Lord never ceases! His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning, Great is thy faithfulness O Lord.
Oh so thankful for this truth today! And to Jesus for putting it in my head.
#oldhymns #nevergetold
July 18th 2013
Jesus name above all names, beautiful Savior, glorious Lord, Emmanuel, God is with us. Blessed Redeemer, living Word.
The sweet praises that rattle round in my brain on calm, cool mornings. #SOinlovewithJesus.
July 17th 2013
The Joy of The Lord is my strength! Whom shall I fear? What can man do to me? His mercies are new every morning, and He prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies. He anoints my head with oil...and while my heart and my flesh may fail, God is my strength and my portion forever! I desire nothing in Heaven but Jesus and I am confident that nothing ....not even my own dumb mistakes, can separate me from Christs Love! Come Lord quickly...
9 Bible verses. Powell Paraphrased!
New heart
The Lord showed me this verse the other day and its super relevant to my life right now! I love it, be blessed. For anyone struggling with discouragement, depression, sadness/grief etc...
"I will give you a new heart, and put a new Spirit in you. I will remove from you, your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh." #Biblealwaysrelevant.
"I will give you a new heart, and put a new Spirit in you. I will remove from you, your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh." #Biblealwaysrelevant.
Reflective Truth
I'm feeling very thoughtful and deep tonight. Im being reflective and learning things about myself, It occurred to me, that the phrase "nobody knows what goes on, behind closed doors" is sort of an understatement and can be applied to so many areas of life. I find myself, plastering on a smile and telling a joke when inside my heart is absolutely breaking. I find myself going through mundane actions, laundry, cooking, putting groceries away, helping kids with homework, when truly all I want to do sometimes is curl up in bed and stay there all day. I find that much of the time, I am praying for others, doling out advice, taking time to listen to them, pray for them and encourage and cheer them on...yet for some reason cannot do that for myself! I guess what I'm learning about myself, is that I am NOT as genuine as I thought I was. I'm not as strong as I thought I was especially in my faith and I'm kind of fake. WOW. That is NOT my intention, and not my calling or heart. But sometimes taking inventory of ourselves is necessary in order to become that which we truly desire to be. So I'm going to ALLOW myself to be more vulnerable and transparent in the coming weeks. Are you ready? Lol#truthwillsetyoufree
Thy Word
Thy Word....
18I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[c] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.
I keep torturing myself. But yet I know its not just me doing it, there is an enemy that wants to destroy me. (1 Peter 5:8) Nevertheless I am awake with questions and haunted by things "that have been so far under the blood for so long, its comical. If God doesnt remember them why should I? Its so obviously the enemy". Things that I've been through and things that I've recently been reminded of and yet NONE of it is relevant to A. Who I am in Christ Today and B. What I do for Christ today or C. What Christ is doing in Me and through me today and for my future. SOOO Why do I dwell on it? Why can't I sleep? Why do I have images, and emotions running amok??? Why does the PAST have so much power over me??
2 Cor. 10:5 "Tear down strongholds, and take captive every thought to the obedience of Christ." I need to take my thoughts captive. But its so hard to do. Especially when I'm dreaming in my sleep. (Or deliberately viewing haunting photos sheesh, why do I do that??)
Psalm 43:18 " Forget the Former things, Do not dwell on the past."
SO much easier said than done. How do you "choose" to forget something? I mean you can't really. Its always there. You can choose not to dwell, and you can choose to pretend, choose how it affects you emotionally, or you can choose how you are going to react... but you can't really erase memories like in Sci-Fi movies. Sooo... there they are. Terrible Memories of things that have happened to me, and even worse... things I have done.
Sometimes, the anxiety of these things is so intense, I cry, I can't sleep, I feel nauseated...
1 Thess 5:17 Pray without Ceasing the Bible says. And Phil 4:6 with prayer and thanksgiving I can come boldly and present my requests to God. So that's what I will do.
Forgiveness is something I have finally learned to grasp. I do not need to forgive myself. And I have already forgiven those who have "done me wrong". These memories and images are simply a reality, a part of something that happened.... but all had a hand in shaping me into who I am today. So for that I will choose to be grateful.
Gen 50:20 What the devil meant for evil God CAN use for Good. Thats in the Bible too. I LOVE God's word. Its incredibly ALIVE and sooo full of Hope and Promises.
Psallm 119:5 Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and Light unto my path....
I keep torturing myself. But yet I know its not just me doing it, there is an enemy that wants to destroy me. (1 Peter 5:8) Nevertheless I am awake with questions and haunted by things "that have been so far under the blood for so long, its comical. If God doesnt remember them why should I? Its so obviously the enemy". Things that I've been through and things that I've recently been reminded of and yet NONE of it is relevant to A. Who I am in Christ Today and B. What I do for Christ today or C. What Christ is doing in Me and through me today and for my future. SOOO Why do I dwell on it? Why can't I sleep? Why do I have images, and emotions running amok??? Why does the PAST have so much power over me??
2 Cor. 10:5 "Tear down strongholds, and take captive every thought to the obedience of Christ." I need to take my thoughts captive. But its so hard to do. Especially when I'm dreaming in my sleep. (Or deliberately viewing haunting photos sheesh, why do I do that??)
Psalm 43:18 " Forget the Former things, Do not dwell on the past."
SO much easier said than done. How do you "choose" to forget something? I mean you can't really. Its always there. You can choose not to dwell, and you can choose to pretend, choose how it affects you emotionally, or you can choose how you are going to react... but you can't really erase memories like in Sci-Fi movies. Sooo... there they are. Terrible Memories of things that have happened to me, and even worse... things I have done.
Sometimes, the anxiety of these things is so intense, I cry, I can't sleep, I feel nauseated...
1 Thess 5:17 Pray without Ceasing the Bible says. And Phil 4:6 with prayer and thanksgiving I can come boldly and present my requests to God. So that's what I will do.
Forgiveness is something I have finally learned to grasp. I do not need to forgive myself. And I have already forgiven those who have "done me wrong". These memories and images are simply a reality, a part of something that happened.... but all had a hand in shaping me into who I am today. So for that I will choose to be grateful.
Gen 50:20 What the devil meant for evil God CAN use for Good. Thats in the Bible too. I LOVE God's word. Its incredibly ALIVE and sooo full of Hope and Promises.
Psallm 119:5 Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and Light unto my path....
Thanks but no thanks!
Thanks... but no thanks.
This is my disclaimer first and foremost and please do not think I have lost sight of this. I know there is so much to be thankful for. I feel so very blessed every day for my kids, my and their health,employment, house, husband, Jesus, friends,bills paid, cars, ability to walk, breathe, smile, laugh, pray... I try and stay positive and look on the bright side. I have always been a glass half full kind of girl and I have always tried to love people unconditionally. I have attempted as much as I am able to BE a blessing to others and not a burden.Helpful, caring, considerate. I have been given much and I love to serve and give back. I love wit and love to laugh-even at myself. I can be such a dork I know. But its part of my charm I suppose. I am so thankful for my friends and all the crap they have seen me through and all the love they have given me...
But Thankfulness should be a way of life. Not once a year. Gratitiude is an attitude that many of the current young generations have not adopted in this ME-centric society. Compassion unfortunately does not come naturally anymore. Doing the "right thing" just because it is the right thing to do. Working hard... with no reward or compensation for the sake of doing work well.. it's a lost art. Taking things for granted for example: education, In-tact parental units, health, Clothing, rooves over heads etc...People have A Sense of entitlement this idea that we have a "right" to ______(fill in the blank) simply because we exist is absurd. I'm not saying that basic human rights are not reasonable. But material things,financial compensation and other "stuff" that kids--especially my kids it seems... feel they "deserve" is mind boggling to me. My children and so many I know are so privelaged and yet SO UNgrateful!! It disgusts me truly.
Also, Thanksgiving holds painful memories for me. I am left grieving on this day and even though it has been 8 years the pain still feels new. It is so deep and so real I cant even describe it. Its the anniversary of the day we found out my daddy was going to die. (which he did just 6 short weeks later) The only reason I mention it, is because I know I'm not alone. For so many of you--you feel the same loss. I just want you to know that I remember. I remember YOU who have lost loved ones, that make the Holidays seem a little less joyful. I remember YOU that you are grieving and that images and memories flood your mind during the Holidays with pain and sorrow. I remember YOU who DONT have food, and a home, or family or friends, or employment or HEALTH. I remember you all, and I am praying for you. This time of year is not always smiles and cheer... this day... while supposed to be a day to count our blessings, can also force come of us to face our fears and remember our trials and can actually cause more pain than Joy. I will remember you and I will pray for you. God Bless you and your Family. May you find something to be thankful for.
So while my kids and I sleep in, and I DONT cook turkey and all the trimming, and we DONT watch t.v specials and we DONT have family/friends over.... we will be going through the Christmas Decor and decorating and looking ahead to truly celebrating very soon, the very reason for my faith and that is Jesus Birth. We will be enjoying a day off of school and work and being thankful for that small blessing. I will be remembering my father and all of you who are also grieving for one reason or another. Praying for you and for World Peace.
If I tagged you it is because I specifically will be remembering each of you in my prayers a bit EXTRA tomorrow! =)
A Single Bite...
With a single bite the world was fractured. Sin covered the whole of the earth. It darkened the landscape and forever changed everything.
For what?
We had everything. We were GIVEN everything. Yet we let our eyes fall on the one thing forbidden to us, as if EVERYTHING was not good enough.
So sin encompassed the world. swallowed it. And communion with and knowing God as He truly is was broken forever. Now we claw & SCRATCH our way back, hoping to find a glimpse of "Eden".
From the first bite of sin, we have held a sense of entitlement that says to God "Thanks, but ....I want more". Much like satan himself did. We walked with God in the cool of the evening and yet somehow it was not good enough. How often today do we say that to God? Whatever hand I've been dealt... We say "God I dont like it, I don't want it or no thanks... I want more!!"
Some of the things I've been pondering as I have been reading :
1,000 Gifts. by ~Ann Voskamp
Good news story of the week!
Good News Story of the Week!
Here is the link to the news story... copy/paste it if it does not take you directly there.
***Original Post*** November 3rd 2011.
Adriana (age 42) has always known she was adopted and even had early memories of her time in Ecuador. She also remembered that she had a younger sister about 1 or 2 years old that had been taken from her when they arrived at the home of the attorney who subsequently handled her adoption to her American family who live in Vermont. She did not have fond memories of her time in Ecuador and the process was traumatic enough that she did not seek out her baby sister although she never forgot her. Recently Adriana decided she would peruse some adoption registries after all and came across a profile for Mia whose story sounded eerily similar. Albeit there were not a whole lot of details she decided to email Mia. It was her very first attempt at finding her sister. What are the odds? After a few emails back and forth sharing the few details they each had, the only way to be certain that they were indeed long-lost sisters was of course a DNA test. After 36 years of waiting and hoping and thinking it was absolutely impossible, Mia’s prayers were answered when on Tuesday Nov. 1st 2011 they received the news that YES indeed they were blood sisters. Currently, neither Adriana or Mia have any plans to meet soon as they do not have the financial ability to do so. But they have both stated a desire to go back to Ecuador at some point in the future. Mia has been back to Ecuador to serve on short term missions teams 4 times since 2006. This is a story of a Miracle that only God could have orchestrated.
***Update/Notes***
Just to set the record Straight to everyone... there seemed to be some confusion, from people I've spoken to also. I did NOT find my sister on FB. I had searched for 18 years, using P.I's, Internet Adoption Databases, going to the registrar place in Quito, even speaking to the Attorney in S. America who handled our adoption... to no avail. It was Adriana who found ME on one of the adoption data bases. She emailed me from there and then we did the DNA test. FB had nothing to do with it. LOL and it was made more miraculous by the fact that Adriana searched the database, without even knowing if I'd even been adopted, (for all she knew I was still in Ecuador. She didnt know if I was dead or alive.) and found me on the FIRST TRY!! THAT is a miracle!!
Thanks to a generous Christmas Gift from Adriana's parents, she & her daughter Cortney are flying in on APRIL 14th for Mia's birthday. This will be the first time they meet since Mia was 2 years old. (She has no recollection of their previous time together so in essence it is the first meeting.)
Mia will be in attendance with Adriana & Cortney at Praise Covenant Church to share their powerful testimony on Sunday April 15th in both services. 9 & 10:45 please feel free to come and be a witness to this amazing conclusion. Incidentally April 15th is Mia's birthday. ;)
Let me also emphasize while there are many stories of "Long lost siblings" finding each other, their story is unique in the sense that there was literally nothing to connect the 2 girls to each other. Without any information of birthplace, dates, names, no paperwork, made-up information for both girls at separate times... only the knowledge of each others existence out of 7+ Billion people on the planet... it was literally an impossibility. But "With God all things are Possible!"
**Update April 11th 2012**
Talk it up TV-Internet Channel is going to DOCUMENT our entire reunion! So fun!!
Adriana (age 42) has always known she was adopted and even had early memories of her time in Ecuador. She also remembered that she had a younger sister about 1 or 2 years old that had been taken from her when they arrived at the home of the attorney who subsequently handled her adoption to her American family who live in Vermont. She did not have fond memories of her time in Ecuador and the process was traumatic enough that she did not seek out her baby sister although she never forgot her. Recently Adriana decided she would peruse some adoption registries after all and came across a profile for Mia whose story sounded eerily similar. Albeit there were not a whole lot of details she decided to email Mia. It was her very first attempt at finding her sister. What are the odds? After a few emails back and forth sharing the few details they each had, the only way to be certain that they were indeed long-lost sisters was of course a DNA test. After 36 years of waiting and hoping and thinking it was absolutely impossible, Mia’s prayers were answered when on Tuesday Nov. 1st 2011 they received the news that YES indeed they were blood sisters. Currently, neither Adriana or Mia have any plans to meet soon as they do not have the financial ability to do so. But they have both stated a desire to go back to Ecuador at some point in the future. Mia has been back to Ecuador to serve on short term missions teams 4 times since 2006. This is a story of a Miracle that only God could have orchestrated.
***Update/Notes***
Just to set the record Straight to everyone... there seemed to be some confusion, from people I've spoken to also. I did NOT find my sister on FB. I had searched for 18 years, using P.I's, Internet Adoption Databases, going to the registrar place in Quito, even speaking to the Attorney in S. America who handled our adoption... to no avail. It was Adriana who found ME on one of the adoption data bases. She emailed me from there and then we did the DNA test. FB had nothing to do with it. LOL and it was made more miraculous by the fact that Adriana searched the database, without even knowing if I'd even been adopted, (for all she knew I was still in Ecuador. She didnt know if I was dead or alive.) and found me on the FIRST TRY!! THAT is a miracle!!
Thanks to a generous Christmas Gift from Adriana's parents, she & her daughter Cortney are flying in on APRIL 14th for Mia's birthday. This will be the first time they meet since Mia was 2 years old. (She has no recollection of their previous time together so in essence it is the first meeting.)
Mia will be in attendance with Adriana & Cortney at Praise Covenant Church to share their powerful testimony on Sunday April 15th in both services. 9 & 10:45 please feel free to come and be a witness to this amazing conclusion. Incidentally April 15th is Mia's birthday. ;)
Let me also emphasize while there are many stories of "Long lost siblings" finding each other, their story is unique in the sense that there was literally nothing to connect the 2 girls to each other. Without any information of birthplace, dates, names, no paperwork, made-up information for both girls at separate times... only the knowledge of each others existence out of 7+ Billion people on the planet... it was literally an impossibility. But "With God all things are Possible!"
**Update April 11th 2012**
Talk it up TV-Internet Channel is going to DOCUMENT our entire reunion! So fun!!
Adriana, my long-lost sister on the Right.
Thelma & Louise... a true story.
Subtitle:
20 years later, I lived to tell about it...
I revisited an old enemy today. One that took many years to face and I finally conquered it. Take a journey with me if you will...
It was a dark & stormy night... no really it was. It was mid-may 1993. I was driving along chambers creek road in my little blue 1979 Honda Crcc hatchback with my friend Jennifer Lund. We were heading to my best friend Dena's house... the road at this time, was quite narrow, had no guard rails, barely paved and had gravel shoulders. Not a good combo for a night of "May Rain" and an old car with bad brakes.
Needless to say as I drove southwest down the slippery slope, with Chambers Creek on my left, my car began to fishtail. I did what I learned in Drivers Ed, but alas... my left my front tire was grabbed suddenly by the gravel and over the cliff we went.
We literally pin-balled through the trees (had a tree imprint on the roof of the car I saw later at the junkyard.) and landed nose down onto a log at the base of the cliff. As we flew threw the air and crashed into everything, I heard my friend Jennifer Screaming and I curled into as much of a ball as I could, covering my head & face with my arms. And I prayed.
In part because of the time of year & day and in part because of the rain. Chambers creek was not a creek. It was a massive, extremely strong flowing river, more than waist deep. Every window in my car was shattered. The rear-view mirror was in my lap. The steering wheel was lodged into my leg...where it split my thigh muscle in half. I was covered in head to toe with glass. I looked at my friend Jen and she appeared unconscious and had blood dripping out of her mouth. ( I thought she was dead. Think of every scary movie you've ever seen when blood is coming out of the mouth! I was sure she was dead.) She also had a tire... yes a tire, wrapped around her head. I unbuckled her seat belt which had tightened so tight she couldn't move and with one arm (think adrenaline) I lifted the tire off of her head. I climbed out of my still buckled seat belt, kicked off my socks and shoes and climbed out my window... the current was so strong I couldn't open my door. And I began to climb. I remember yelling down to Jen, to just breathe and stay alive. I thought I had killed my friend. It was pitch black and I looked up at the sky and still raining. I could not get my bearings. I have never been so afraid in my LIFE. I didn't even know which side of the river I was on! I didn't know where the embankment was or how far we had fallen or if I could even make it to help. But I had to try.
I began the slippery climb straight up the side of the cliff. It was covered with tree vines and roots and sticker bushes. I grabbed on to them as much as I could and with my bare feet (mind you I was in a miniskirt and t-shirt) made it to the top. I was covered in Mud and scratches from the branches and sticker bushes. I had blood running down my arms and legs from glass and injuries. I began to scream and wave my arms at every car that drove by. NOBODY STOPPED!! I was crying so hard. I kept yelling to Jennifer... just breathe!! I was praying to God and thinking... "these cars must think I'm an escaped mental patient from Western State". Finally a TRUCKER (big rig) stopped and called 911 from his radio.
2 hook & ladder trucks, 5 police cars, an entire road closure and an ambulance... I sat on the cliff waiting for help. Just crying and calling out to Jennifer that everything would be okay. They had to use the hook & ladder x 2 to reach the back of my car and pulled her out on a stretcher THROUGH the back window.
I went into shock. I had lost a lot of blood...from my torn thigh & what I found out later was a cracked femur. They put me in the ambulance, and got me started on an IV etc... then a few moments later as I lay on the backboard staring into the mirror like roof of the ambulance, I saw them wheel in Jen. I started to cry and I just kept saying over and over.. I'm so sorry jen, I'm so sorry! She smiled at me through the reflection and said "Do you think Jason and Jack are going to be mad?" (our then-boyfriends, future husbands, were roommates at the time) I knew then, she was going to be okay and that she'd forgive me!!! Turned out the blood coming out of her mouth, was where her braces had cut her lips!
We were taken to St. Claire hospital and were met by our boyfriends and their families. There is a looonng story which I will not go into later about the adventures that night at the hospital but for now... there are several things I want to point out.
I believe we were miraculously saved. That is MY belief. The police report said it was "at least 115 feet" from the top to the bottom. My father went down the next day to retrieve some important things from the cliff-side, while it was daylight and NOT raining, he wore hiking boots and still managed to slip several times and cut his hand. He shook his head as he told me, he doesn't know how a little girl with no shoes in a miniskirt climbed up the cliff from the bottom in the dark and in the rain. I was told over the course of the next several days by the fire department that the gas tank had been knocked loose and fallen out at the TOP of the cliff. A full tank which if hit the wrong way may have ignited. We landed straight down onto a tree trunk. The river/current being what it was, I was told that if that tree trunk had not have been there we most assuredly would have tipped over onto the roof of the car, upside down and been swept away and drowned. Lastly, both Jen & I walked away with some MINOR injuries and were told we were lucky to be alive... I was able to walk immediately with a brace and ace wrap on my femur and she had a fairly substantial concussion as a result of the tire, but basically minor injuries.
But it took me nearly 5 months before I would get behind the wheel of a car again and 3 YEARS before I drove down Chambers Creek road. 3 whole years and even then, it was only after a mud slide had pretty much wiped it out and so they repaved it, widened it and put guard rails up!
I have driven on that road hundreds of times since then and while I do feel comfortable on it now, I had yet to actually peer down into the river .. for fear of remembering that fateful night and having flashbacks of rain pouring down on me, of not knowing which way was up or what side we were on, of feeling powerless by the trees and the current. Of the sound of metal crunching and glass shattering. But today... without planning it at all, I went to the creek. I sat in the spit. I watched my daughter play in the sand. I got a suntan. I looked at the trees and the top of the cliff. FROM THE BOTTOM OF IT Once again.... and I was NOT afraid. Thank you Jesus.
Be sure to read the comments below for Jen's version. ;)
I revisited an old enemy today. One that took many years to face and I finally conquered it. Take a journey with me if you will...
It was a dark & stormy night... no really it was. It was mid-may 1993. I was driving along chambers creek road in my little blue 1979 Honda Crcc hatchback with my friend Jennifer Lund. We were heading to my best friend Dena's house... the road at this time, was quite narrow, had no guard rails, barely paved and had gravel shoulders. Not a good combo for a night of "May Rain" and an old car with bad brakes.
Needless to say as I drove southwest down the slippery slope, with Chambers Creek on my left, my car began to fishtail. I did what I learned in Drivers Ed, but alas... my left my front tire was grabbed suddenly by the gravel and over the cliff we went.
We literally pin-balled through the trees (had a tree imprint on the roof of the car I saw later at the junkyard.) and landed nose down onto a log at the base of the cliff. As we flew threw the air and crashed into everything, I heard my friend Jennifer Screaming and I curled into as much of a ball as I could, covering my head & face with my arms. And I prayed.
In part because of the time of year & day and in part because of the rain. Chambers creek was not a creek. It was a massive, extremely strong flowing river, more than waist deep. Every window in my car was shattered. The rear-view mirror was in my lap. The steering wheel was lodged into my leg...where it split my thigh muscle in half. I was covered in head to toe with glass. I looked at my friend Jen and she appeared unconscious and had blood dripping out of her mouth. ( I thought she was dead. Think of every scary movie you've ever seen when blood is coming out of the mouth! I was sure she was dead.) She also had a tire... yes a tire, wrapped around her head. I unbuckled her seat belt which had tightened so tight she couldn't move and with one arm (think adrenaline) I lifted the tire off of her head. I climbed out of my still buckled seat belt, kicked off my socks and shoes and climbed out my window... the current was so strong I couldn't open my door. And I began to climb. I remember yelling down to Jen, to just breathe and stay alive. I thought I had killed my friend. It was pitch black and I looked up at the sky and still raining. I could not get my bearings. I have never been so afraid in my LIFE. I didn't even know which side of the river I was on! I didn't know where the embankment was or how far we had fallen or if I could even make it to help. But I had to try.
I began the slippery climb straight up the side of the cliff. It was covered with tree vines and roots and sticker bushes. I grabbed on to them as much as I could and with my bare feet (mind you I was in a miniskirt and t-shirt) made it to the top. I was covered in Mud and scratches from the branches and sticker bushes. I had blood running down my arms and legs from glass and injuries. I began to scream and wave my arms at every car that drove by. NOBODY STOPPED!! I was crying so hard. I kept yelling to Jennifer... just breathe!! I was praying to God and thinking... "these cars must think I'm an escaped mental patient from Western State". Finally a TRUCKER (big rig) stopped and called 911 from his radio.
2 hook & ladder trucks, 5 police cars, an entire road closure and an ambulance... I sat on the cliff waiting for help. Just crying and calling out to Jennifer that everything would be okay. They had to use the hook & ladder x 2 to reach the back of my car and pulled her out on a stretcher THROUGH the back window.
I went into shock. I had lost a lot of blood...from my torn thigh & what I found out later was a cracked femur. They put me in the ambulance, and got me started on an IV etc... then a few moments later as I lay on the backboard staring into the mirror like roof of the ambulance, I saw them wheel in Jen. I started to cry and I just kept saying over and over.. I'm so sorry jen, I'm so sorry! She smiled at me through the reflection and said "Do you think Jason and Jack are going to be mad?" (our then-boyfriends, future husbands, were roommates at the time) I knew then, she was going to be okay and that she'd forgive me!!! Turned out the blood coming out of her mouth, was where her braces had cut her lips!
We were taken to St. Claire hospital and were met by our boyfriends and their families. There is a looonng story which I will not go into later about the adventures that night at the hospital but for now... there are several things I want to point out.
I believe we were miraculously saved. That is MY belief. The police report said it was "at least 115 feet" from the top to the bottom. My father went down the next day to retrieve some important things from the cliff-side, while it was daylight and NOT raining, he wore hiking boots and still managed to slip several times and cut his hand. He shook his head as he told me, he doesn't know how a little girl with no shoes in a miniskirt climbed up the cliff from the bottom in the dark and in the rain. I was told over the course of the next several days by the fire department that the gas tank had been knocked loose and fallen out at the TOP of the cliff. A full tank which if hit the wrong way may have ignited. We landed straight down onto a tree trunk. The river/current being what it was, I was told that if that tree trunk had not have been there we most assuredly would have tipped over onto the roof of the car, upside down and been swept away and drowned. Lastly, both Jen & I walked away with some MINOR injuries and were told we were lucky to be alive... I was able to walk immediately with a brace and ace wrap on my femur and she had a fairly substantial concussion as a result of the tire, but basically minor injuries.
But it took me nearly 5 months before I would get behind the wheel of a car again and 3 YEARS before I drove down Chambers Creek road. 3 whole years and even then, it was only after a mud slide had pretty much wiped it out and so they repaved it, widened it and put guard rails up!
I have driven on that road hundreds of times since then and while I do feel comfortable on it now, I had yet to actually peer down into the river .. for fear of remembering that fateful night and having flashbacks of rain pouring down on me, of not knowing which way was up or what side we were on, of feeling powerless by the trees and the current. Of the sound of metal crunching and glass shattering. But today... without planning it at all, I went to the creek. I sat in the spit. I watched my daughter play in the sand. I got a suntan. I looked at the trees and the top of the cliff. FROM THE BOTTOM OF IT Once again.... and I was NOT afraid. Thank you Jesus.
Be sure to read the comments below for Jen's version. ;)
Grand Re-Opening
I began this blog early in 2006 and wasn't quite sure what I was going to do with it. So its been pretty sporadic. THEN Facebook came along and I began posting everything I would have posted on this blog onto FB. But recently I've realized that my own thoughts, wisdom, insight etc... is too much for FB and my FB peeps to handle.
I think I have a lot of things to say, and my opinions are not always welcome to the masses. I don't feel led anymore to impose my views on others, but rather invite others to see my views of their own volition. So I am writing this to INVITE you to follow me. But will not be offended in the slightest if you choose not to.
DISCLAIMER**
I am a conservative protestant Christian. Therefore my statements are based upon this worldview. I am NOT intending to offend anyone, and I love ALL people regardless of gender, race, sexuality, religion (or lackthereof) I will NEVER "judge" you and I am humbly asking that you do not judge me either. The greatest thing about living in America is the freedom to think and speak and believe what we want to WITHOUT FEAR OF RETALIATION. So any negative comments, debates or disagreements... please keep those to yourself. This is my blog wherein I can choose to write whatever I want to and its OKAY to not agree with me!!! But please do so respectfully. I will still love you so; hopefully you will also still love me.
I think I have a lot of things to say, and my opinions are not always welcome to the masses. I don't feel led anymore to impose my views on others, but rather invite others to see my views of their own volition. So I am writing this to INVITE you to follow me. But will not be offended in the slightest if you choose not to.
DISCLAIMER**
I am a conservative protestant Christian. Therefore my statements are based upon this worldview. I am NOT intending to offend anyone, and I love ALL people regardless of gender, race, sexuality, religion (or lackthereof) I will NEVER "judge" you and I am humbly asking that you do not judge me either. The greatest thing about living in America is the freedom to think and speak and believe what we want to WITHOUT FEAR OF RETALIATION. So any negative comments, debates or disagreements... please keep those to yourself. This is my blog wherein I can choose to write whatever I want to and its OKAY to not agree with me!!! But please do so respectfully. I will still love you so; hopefully you will also still love me.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)